Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Wednesday Words of Wisdom- Encourage Your Husband

Baby Shower 2001

I am sure everyone is aware Sunday is Father’s Day. It is so often overlooked by all. In fact, it seems my own husband may have to work on Father’s Day this year! I feel Father’s Day is a great time to encourage Dads or husbands everywhere. Actually, I feel we should encourage them every day! Yes, men do get discouraged too! I thought I would share a few simple ways to encourage your husband this week whether he is a father or not!

  • Keep a Positive and Happy Attitude!

That’s right! For the remainder of the week try your best to be happy and positive! Do not complain or nag or nit pick or fuss over meaningless things! Today is Wednesday. Try it for a few days and see what a difference it will make in your marriage. Before we got married we talked a lot about how other couples and how they seemed to always be at each other for some reason or another! We vowed in the beginning we would try our best to NOT treat each other the way we witnessed other couples! I have not been perfect, but my husband has been great. In nearly 12 years of marriage, he has never fussed at me or complained! We have not always agreed, but we choose to deal with things differently and talk them out instead of being mad at each other. Unfortunately, there are times when I am upset, but as soon as I open up and express myself, it is all over!

  • Thank Him!

Thank him for all he does for you and for your family. If you are a stay-at-home mom, you have a lot to be thankful for! If it was not for your husbands willingness to go to work EVERY DAY without complaint, you would be working too! I am amazed at my husband’s devotion to providing for our family! He is a true blessing. I have not thanked him enough in the past. I have been trying for the last few months to thank him every day for all he does for us!

  • Be Content!

Make the most of what you have! Be content! It could always be worse! I know it is easy to become discontent especially when you are in a situation you do not want to be in! I know, I have been there recently. However, trusting in God and being thankful for what I do have and where I am instead of ungrateful for being taken away from where I want to be is a much better answer! It has made a big difference in the attitude in our home since I have gotten over my depression and self-pity and have been content with what I have! Oh, how God has blessed us! HE is truly amazing!

  • Write Him A Letter!

Take time to write your husband a love letter or just a small note of encouragement. I recently had a card mailed to his work. He loved it! It was great for him to get a little reminder of us during his busy day at work. He loves his job, but he would much rather be at home with us all the time than have to go off to work everyday! Our goal one day is for him to work from home, but right now it is not best for our family financial situation.

  • Make His Favorite Foods!

My husband LOVES my gluten free spaghetti casserole. I try to make it for his lunches to send or at least make it once a week for him at supper at home. He never tires of eating it! When we first got married, I began planning our meals around the things he likes. It also meant a change in my diet as well. There were things he ate which at the time I did not eat very often. However, since it was not unhealthy things, I learned to eat them! He has never liked consuming a lot of sugar or wheat even before we began a gluten free diet. It was difficult for me at first. Even though I did not eat a lot of sweets, I still ate more than him. He did not even want it in the house! YIKES! Well, we compromised and learned to have them in moderation instead of excluding them completely. I also learned to use alternatives to sugar for sweetening foods. Most of the time he and no one else ever know I did not use sugar in a particular recipe!

  • Save Some Time for HIM!

There are so very many evenings when my husband comes home that I am just too tired to even talk or take time to ask him about his day. It is not I do not care, I am just exhausted! Especially during pregnancy! I usually do not have much problem with tiredness or lack of energy when not pregnant.  Anyway, make time to ask him about his day! Give him a massage! Greet him when he comes in the door! Greet him with a smile and hug and kiss and an “I love you and I missed you!” when he comes in the door! See his reaction! One of our favorite times of the day is when Daddy comes home from work! Everyone drops what they are doing and runs to kiss him and see who can kiss him first! If you need to take a nap before he gets home, try your best to do so! You may have to lay all the children down with you! I have had to in the past! Now, the older ones can watch the younger ones for a little bit while I take a short nap!

  • Pretend You are Courting/Dating

How would you behave if you were still courting and there were no children in the picture or other things? What did you do for him while you were dating? Most of us put our boyfriend/girlfriend first when we were dating! We wanted to make him/her happy! I know I did. I loved him so much, I wanted to live every day to see him happy! Things to think about: How to you look? How are you dressed? How do you smell? How do you feel? You do not have to put on an evening gown, but I am sure he will appreciate you in something besides sweat pants! It was a struggle for me to “dress” better around the house. I have never been one to dress up much or wear make-up or fix my hair, but I do try to look presentable when he gets home. I run a brush through my hair. I am trying to dress better each day wearing nicer shirts with an apron over them. I do not want to look too frumpy. Ask your husband what he prefers you to wear and dress for him! My husband is fine with either pants or a dress. He is glad I do not wear make-up. However, I discovered he really likes my toe nails painted! So, even though I do not like them painted, I have learned to paint them every so often just for him! Actually, the children like to give me a make over and they will paint them which is how I discovered he liked it in the first place!

These are only a very few ideas to encourage your husband. While, I encourage you to try to encourage him every day, I am challenging you to try it for the remainder of the week and see what a difference it makes in your marriage! If things are really bad, it may take a while for him to even realize what is going on. Be humble! Be honest! Be in love!

The picture above is of my husband and me just before our first child was born in 2001. We had been married about 10 months when the picture was taken. Our first child was born 11 months after we were married.

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